butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
Randomize
