Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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