Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
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