why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Randomize
