bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
