and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Randomize
