they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Randomize
