I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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