He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Randomize
