Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
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