Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
I just blew my weed a kiss
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Blow job season was short but glorious.
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize