I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
Let's get the cat blown out
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
