i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
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