Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
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