I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Randomize
