i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
