It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
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I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
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Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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