Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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