is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize
