she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
that is very illegal...i love you.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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