Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
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