i will never coherently bang her
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
