Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize