apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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