Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
