he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Randomize
