The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
We talked him into tasing himself.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
It all started with a game of naked twister.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Randomize
