I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
people are starting to question the shark bite story
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize
