time to smoke my breakfast
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Randomize
