I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
Randomize
