ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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