Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
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