Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize
