The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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