Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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