her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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