i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
