Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
Randomize
