only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Are we still banned from the library?
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize