I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Randomize
