I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
