Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
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