Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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