You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
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