i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Randomize
