I think im going to throw up on grandma
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
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