fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize
