I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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