He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
