Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
Randomize
