I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
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